Twitter is a bit like a pub where all the drinks are free. To get your free drinks you are required to tell everyone in the pub what you are having, as well as anything else that pops into your head.
Despite the free beer, all that shouting can get a bit oppressive. There is a hard core of locals, and they are a rather odd bunch. It's not like they stop and stare at you when you walk in, it's actually worse than that. They carry on shouting at each other and rudely ignore your very existence.
It's people talking about what they want to drink beheadedchicken: im gonna basically have gin grenadine and tonic water i think
Interspersed with things that are impossible to understand: @pworld12 WTF!!! LMAO Hell Naw!!! Lol
Some people try and strike up a conversation: TheMagnificen7 : @beheadedchicken I will happily help you consume that.
Others just show off:
marksanborn: @saigonnezumi technically Linux is not an operating system it is only a kernel
Stephen Fry tells you who he had dinner with:stephenfry: Had enchanting dinner last night with Valery Gergyev (my fave conductor) & Fabio Capello whom I took to greatly. Dignity,charm: music lover
But mostly people just talk about what they are drinking: @redvers Real... and all too awful. On second beer. Helps a bit.
The landlords are focused simply on getting as many people crammed in as possible. They have promised never to charge for the drinks, but once they have got enough people hooked they will probably do something cunning like lock the doors and force people to pay to let them leave.
Recently the pub has been discovered by some new people - shifty marketing types, tourists, and people who heard it was cool and wanted to see what all the fuss was about.
The marketing types wear slick suits and desperately want you to listen to what they have to say. They will even pretend to be interested in what you are saying in an attempt to trick you into listening to them.
The tourists just come to see the sorry spectacle that is Stephen Fry. He holds court at the bar, totally addicted to the attention, surrounded by a swarm of people who wish they were interesting enough for him to invite to dinner.
After about a month, the people who came by because they heard it was cool have been talking so much they have lost their voice. They are really in need of refreshment. And that's when they realise that the pub doesn't actually serve drinks. For the locals, it's just about the shouting.
